My Dearest Lydia
A father's letters to his unborn baby girl with anencephaly.
A journey of a man and His God through grief and mercy.
A journey of a man and His God through grief and mercy.
Every dollar will go towards medical bills and healing.
1 Corinthians 15:52-57 “in a flash, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, the dead will be raised imperishable, and we will be changed. For the perishable must clothe itself with the imperishable, and the mortal with immortality. When the perishable has been clothed with the imperishable and the mortal with immortality, then the saying that is written will come true: “Death has been swallowed up in victory.”
Dear My Dearest Lydia, it has been a while since my last post. Life happens. We move forward. We learn to live with the pain, hardships, and we must push forward. Knowing that this time will be like dust in the wind, that Jesus will be back, and all pain will subside, this is a hope that all of us must have. This world is too much, it's also dark, and at times our frail bodies fail us at the point of absolute "musts".
We must push forward. We must live our lives. We cannot be confined to the past or future. We must be present in our lives, living the here and now, and at times this is the hardest thing to do. I want to hold you in my arms, to love you, and these moments will come. I want to walk you down the aisle for your marriage, but your wedding may never happen. Doctors give you no hope, but I have Hope that God is bigger and will carry us all through these darkest of days. So, I must strive to be the best husband, best father to your brother, and love you with a hum or a song at night in your mother's womb.
I cannot be consumed even with the end of the world and the trumpets. That will come. The here and now will come and go without any way to return, and so I strive to be here for your mommy and brother. I strive to be present with many failures along the way. I drove myself into work, pushed myself into building a studio, and left my family behind - mostly because of the pain. But, I find comfort and love in those moments and must return, for your mom's sake. I must be a husband and father, first. I must be a child of God and allow life to come into my soul; I must not hide anymore.
“Where, O death, is your victory?
Where, O death, is your sting?”
I can now rejoice knowing that you are close to God, God is in me, and therefore, you are closest to me that I have ever known. You're soul, spirit, essence, is in me, because God is. You are my dearest, Princess. The tears come and go with knowing that you are coming very quickly into this world... and you might be leaving just as soon. What is a father to do, but to protect and love the ones that are here right now. Taking care of your mother is taking care of you, my love. My dearest Lydia Dianne.
The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law. But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.”
I had a dear loved one tell me that if the death of his child or grandchild didn't get him to heaven, he didn't know what would. That is so true in my life as I see your little body growing and coming into the world fast. Too fast. I will see you in heaven someday, my love. I will march harder in this life by loving harder, breathing deeper, and looking at the mundane as the miraculous. I must live this life as if it is my last breath as if I am living for God as if I have a purpose; to see you at the end.
My primary purpose as anyone is to proclaim God's love for us all. My second is to get my family to heaven with the example I leave behind. But, my dear, you are an active force in my life. I will see you in Heaven after our long or short time together. I will see you.
People seem to care more about their pets than babies these days, my Love. Not your mom or dad. We love you with all our being. It has been disheartening at times when "pet lovers" tell us that they don't understand us deciding to go through the financial struggle we are putting ourselves through. Where are the "people lovers"? They would keep a dog alive until the very end, no matter what the issue might be. They would go to the ends of the earth to take care of a dying pet, but not a baby. For shame.
Let us all give thanks to life. Let us all protect life, no matter what. Your life is a gift to my life, Dearest Lydia. Do you know why? Your creation created in me a desire to love my God harder than ever before, and I will spend my life telling people to you - and in that, I will be showing people my God and my Lord. You made me a better child of God. Thank you.
When we give in to death and say yes to lesser things, that is a terrible place for a soul to find itself. Let us love human lives and souls first.
To make a donation to the Lydia campaign, please www.gofundme.com/DearestLydiaclick on the button, or here and donate. Every dollar will go towards helping Lydia and Miranda, and to help the family with preparations for her arrival. This blog will serve as a future testimony of a Father, a Mother, and their undying love for a little girl named Lydia.
Our daughter, Lydia Dianne McDonald, was diagnosed with a terminal condition called Anencephaly. It plainly means she an unfinished scull and her brain damaged, making her not able to live outside the womb. These are my letters to my daughter and how I would try to explain this to her and my own soul. This is my letters to God and my daughter.